


Wishing it's real (and knowing it's not)

by ladyfoxxx, Pennyplainknits



Category: Bandom, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Not!Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-09
Updated: 2012-10-09
Packaged: 2017-11-15 23:58:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/533212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyfoxxx/pseuds/ladyfoxxx, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pennyplainknits/pseuds/Pennyplainknits
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a break-up, Mikey needs a pretend boyfriend to make the ex jealous. Ray's just the man for the job. </p><p> </p><p>  <em>Ray doesn't want Mikey to be nervous. He can make this convincing. Mikey fits really nicely in the circle of his arms & the moshpit is fierce and Mikey's only small, it makes sense for Ray to shield him with his body fitted tightly to his. </em></p>
            </blockquote>





	Wishing it's real (and knowing it's not)

**Author's Note:**

> This started off as not!fic and then grew some coherance along the way? Co written with Ladyfoxxx. If it's smoking hot porn, she wrote it. <3 for her and our complimentary fannishness.
> 
> Thank you to rivers_bend who transcribed some of the early twitter fic <3
> 
> Not beta'd and, of course, not real.

Ray/Mikey fake-dating maybe? Mikey gets dumped and needs pretend-boyfriend Ray to make the ex jealous?

First Ray is all "why me? you LIVE WITH FRANK" and also, people would totally BUY Mikey/Frank because they are both pretty!

It's not that he doesn't want to, you see. It's just that it needs to be CONVINCING.

Plus Ray is totally straight, but y'know he can do Mikey a favour! And Mikey's like “you are a WAY more impressive boyfriend than Frank.”

TOTALLY straight (drunk makeouts notwithstanding, why do I find the idea of Ray as a 3 beer queer so appealing?) Mikey's all PLEASE JUST COME TO THIS SHOW? and Ray's always up for some live music, so he goes. Mikey holds his hand until the band starts and his hand is a little sweaty but Ray can see, through years of experience, how nervous Mikey is, so he hold tighter and pulls Mikey into his lap when they sit down.

Ray doesn't want Mikey to be nervous. He can make this convincing. Mikey fits really nicely in the circle of his arms & the moshpit is fierce and Mikey's only small, it makes sense for Ray to shield him with his body fitted tightly to his. Plus Ray has had a few beers and the more he thinks about it, some making out would totally sell this. They should do that.

They totally should. Maybe after this set has finished, because Mikey's jumping around, surprisingly graceful, and it's nice to watch. So the set finished and Mikey's spent the last 10 minutes of it pressed up tight against Ray's front, Ray's hand on his hip over his tight jeans and Mikey kind of steers him back towards the bar and gets them another drink. Ray's happily buzzed and he sort of lists a bit into Mikey as they stand there.

And Mikey curls into him and it's nice right up until Mikey stiffens up and when Ray looks up, there is the chump that dumped Mikey! Ray's all >:-( and Mikey's all :-| and Ray actually starts to feel territorial!

Ray tightens his hand around Mikey's waist and it's kind of noisy so he has to lean close to whisper in Mikey's ear. "Wanna go?" and Mikey kind of rubs his cheek against him like a cat, and says, "he doesn't get my favourite bar, we're staying".

ugh YES. Mikey is STEELY AND DETERMINED

Oh no! Chump is coming over! Mikey closes his eyes muttering "don't talk to me oh god don't talk to me" and Ray is WORRIED.

Ray wants to shoot the chump a Look, but he feels like it isn't very effective. Chump is pushing his way through the crowd!

What can he do? He needs to divert this! He needs a PLAN. However the only plan at hand is 'make out with Mikey'

It's not the best plan, but it is the plan at hand! So he tilts Mikey's head toward him and says "remember you asked me for this" and well, he PLANS to just peck him on the lips. That will be convincing, right? But then Mikey kind of sighs and opens his mouth and he tastes of spit and beer and when Ray comes back to himself he finds Mikey's got one leg hooked round his hip.

And wow okay, Ray knew Mikey should be a good kisser, he's seen him making out with randoms enough times over the years, but experiencing it first hand is kind of breathtaking. Mikey's looking up at him all wetlipped and rumpled and breathless and Ray kind of wants to keep going.

Keeping going sounds awesome, he's happily buzzed and the music is great & Mikey's kind of melting into him. Then someone calls Mikey for across the bar and Mikey disentangles himself and goes over. Ray studies the rings of wet on the bar and feels weirdly disappointed. Chump is nowhere to be seen.

Ray starts to think he's no longer needed, then chump sidles up all big time and starts talking trash about Mikey to Ray, saying shit like, "you might want to double bag your dick, everyone's had Mikey" and just generally being an asshole. And Ray is fucking PISSED, he's all "you can back the fuck up asshole" but the guy really wants a fight and Ray isn't usually up for that but he's saying such vile things & before Ray realises he's got the guy by the throat. A small crowd has gathered around Ray & the chump and Ray is near cracking when Mikey tugs his arm. "Ray, c'mon he's not worth it, let's just go," and Ray has to take a breath to calm before shoving the guy away.

They're nearly at the door when the guy yells something vile about Ray. "That's it" Mikey says, and strides forward and punches him. Ray grabs him by the back of the shirt and hustles him out. "Are you Ok?"

Mikey says, "I think I broke my fucking hand."

(GO MIKEY!)

(omg MikeyWAY *clutches heart*)

and they totally get chucked out of the venue for fighting. Like badasses. Ray's hands are shaking when he lights his cigarette outside, "I'm sorry. I should have done that for you, what a dick. I can't believe you dated that guy."

Mikey shrugs, clutching his hand to his chest, "He was up for it." Ray's like "You need to date better guys" and Mikey looks up at him like, "better guys don't want to date me."

It's on the tip of Ray's tongue to say "you should date me" but wait! what is he thinking, this is all PRETEND. They end up at Frank and Mikey’s place because if anyone knows how to deal with injuries from scrapping it's Frank. Ray has to listen to Mikey explaining (again) why he dated the asshole while he holds a bag of frozen peas to Mikey's hand.

Frank makes some snide comment about Mikey getting stuck on unattainable guys and dating dicks as a punishment.

Mikey gives him the finger with the hand that isn't currently being held by Ray but Frank is unrepentant.

But all is forgiven because Frank has weed. And beer. Eventually they are sauced and giggly and Mikey is using Ray's stomach as a pillow and Ray can't stop playing with Mikey's hair. Ray isn't really thinking too hard about it, but when Mikey leaves to go pee Frank tells him, "be careful with Mikey"

Ray blinks slowly "I didn't hurt his hand. I wanted to get out of there."

"It's not his hand I'm worried about,” says Frank, "I wasn't kidding about Mikey's unattainable guys thing. Unattainable and STRAIGHT. Don't lead him on."

Ray's like "I'm not leading him on, it was just faking.” Even though he's not sure it was.

Frank says "faking for you, maybe."

Ray's about to say "what the hell" but then Mikey comes back and flops down between them and elbows Frank until he moves aside so he can curl up on Ray's' chest again.

"Thanks for helping me out," he says to Ray.

"Any time," Ray says, and pretends like he can't feel Frank's eyes boring into him as they watch late night cartoons and Mikey drools on his shirt.

Right. So they crash out and the next morning Ray is too shy to bring it up and it's not awkward except for when it's slightly awkward, but they don't talk about it and things are normal until Mikey finds out that chump has a new bf/gf and they're both going to be at... something important! a gallery thing for Gerard! Gee would KILL Mikey if he skipped it, so, Mikey needs to borrow Ray again.

And of course Ray says yes! Because that is what friends do. And he gets it into his head to treat it like an actual date so Mikes can see what that looks like, so he'll be able to see which people DESERVE him and not keep dating assholes. That makes sense!

(oh god he's so gone for Mikey it's not even funny)

For serious. So he goes all out, like presses his pants and cleans the crap out of his car and picks Mikey up. He doesn' t know if this is how dudes do it but it's how HE does it and he thinks he fulfils the decent person requirement

Yeah he is going to do it his way, he doesn't know another way so why the hell not. And he's PERFECT.

(he IS) And so he picks Mikey up, and Mikey is his own brand of dressed up! He has no smudges on his glasses and is wearing eyeliner and his good jeans and the Buzzcocks shirt he saves for special occasions. and Ray tucks Mikey's hand into the crook of his arm the second they get to the venue and doesn't leave his side the whole night and it's, just really nice.

And Ray really really LIKES it. Like he has a good time, but also, he REALLY likes having Mikey by his side and it's pretty much the best date he's ever been on and he and Mikey don't make out at the venue, but they're very cuddly and it's not all for show, either. It starts to just feel natural and RIGHT.

So he walks Mikey right to his front door and they just kind of hang around there in the corridor shooting the shit. And this is where Ray would totally give a real date a kiss goodnight but he's not sure of the rules anymore. He's about to turn around and go when Mikey leans in and presses his lips to Ray's cheek, high, near his eye. "Thanks Ray." he says softly and before Ray can say anything he's slipped inside the door leaving Ray outside.

Next day Ray wakes up with Gerard sitting on his feet at the end of the bed. He's glaring at him.

(LOL Mikey has overprotective friends AND overprotective brother.)

Right so Gerard's kinda pissy, he tells Ray "stop messing with Mikey's head," and Ray's like ??? "It was a date" and Gee's like "not a real date. You need to stop being so nice." Ray: "What, he's not allowed to date nice guys?" Gerard says "No he's not allowed to date STRAIGHT guys. Stop teasing him."

Ray's like "What? Mikey doesn't even want to date me."

Gerard cocks his head and says "um, how many people has Mikey broken up with?" Ray says "bunches" because Mikey's...Mikey. And Gerard says "and how many have needed someone to PRETEND to be his boyfriend after?"

Rays like "Mikey has a thing for me?" Gee rolls his eyes, "yes you fucking MORON. You need to back off before you hurt him." Ray's like, "what you'd rather he keep dating jerks?" and Gee's like, "did you miss the part where you're straight?" Ray goes "maybe I'm changing my mind about that."

Gee sighs, "I don't know if sexually confused nice guy is much safer than jerk."

Ray goes "hey! You just said I was a nice guy" and beams at Gee until Gee gives him a reluctant smile. "Do me a favour and don't prove me wrong, okay Toro?"

Ray nods, of course, of course, and Gerard slides off the bed and leaves him to it. But Ray doesn't know what to DO! Does he straight up ASK Mikey, who he figures probably won't believe him? Should he wait and hope Mikey needs another fake bf soon? And then he has an idea-what if there was a thing where HE needed a date? Mikey would totally help him out, right?

Mikey WOULD totally want to help him out! Unfortunately Ray has no convenient weddings or other date-needed things coming up so he pretends there is a girl from work who is being a bit full-on. Someone nice and all but Ray's not interested.

"It was just easier to tell her I was seeing someone" he tells Mikey, "except now I need a someone, would you mind?"

Mikey hesitates, but only for the briefest moment before saying "of course, duh." It's only fair after all, right?

Right! So Ray tells Mikey that the girl will be at this thing which just HAPPENS to be where one of Mikey's favourite bands are playing. And Mikey looks like he might suspect something, briefly, but he just says ok, and that he will meet Ray there because he has to do something at work first (he is I think still at eyeball?)

So Ray nods "thank you thank you, seriously Mikey you've saved my life" And Mikey kind of leans against him on the sofa where they are watching Stargate and says no problem, and sort of curls into him and Ray can't wait until he can have this for real.

Ray gets to the club before Mikey and he waits by the bar, feeling kind of awkward. He hopes Mikey won't notice that there’s like, no one from his work there. The band's started by the time Mikey arrives, and he just strides up to Ray and kisses him. Ray's heart flips over in his chest and it just feels so natural to put his arms around Mikey and kiss back. he leaves his arm around Mikey after & Mikey grins up at him from behind his hair, "hi babe," Mikey says "how was that?"

“That was great!" Ray says, even though awesome would be a more appropriate description. Mikey asks where Ray's friends are & Ray just shrugs like, not here yet, hey look the band are playing lets watch them! So they get all cozy in the moshpit, but when the band finishes Rays kinda run out of distractions. He has to fess up!

Mikey says "so they didn't show up, huh?" And Ray's about to make up some lie, but that's not what good guys do and Mikey deserves the truth. so he ushers Mikey over to a quiet corner. He kisses Mikey one more time, just in case it all goes wrong and Mikey is a little surprised but he totally rolls with it.

YES! They make out and Ray can FEEL he's clutching too tightly to Mikey's shoulders but he doesn't want to let GO. And then he slowly sits back and Mikey's blinking at him from behind his glasses and Ray says "I have to tell you something."

“Your friends from work aren't here, are they?" Mikey says, and he sounds so resigned, like he's USED to guys he dates being assholes that it breaks Ray's HEART.

“No”, Ray says, “they're not. I I just wanted the excuse."

And Mikey's caught between shock and confusion. "You wanted the excuse? You need an excuse to kiss me?" And Mikey is playing at sarcasm but underneath there is some real hurt.

Ray's got nothing for it, "No I really don't," he tugs on his ear and says "yeah. I thought that, yeah... I wanted to kiss you. I kind of want to do it all the time. I just don't know how to do it without the excuse."

Mikey's eyes go all soft, "All the time?" Ray nods, yeah ALL the time. And then Mikey does that thing, that perfect mikeyway thing and just looks down at his nails while Ray says, "now you know how I feel"

Then Mikey looks up at Ray, considering, "You know, its really not that hard. Let me show you." He pushes up on his toes & kisses Ray. Ray's arms go round him straight away and he doesn't want to let Mikey go. But Mikey's not going anywhere, he twists his hands into Ray's shirt and walks backward until he hits the wall and that's a great idea because it means Ray can lean into him and Mikey spreads his legs so that Ray can slot between them and he's overwhelmed, Mikey's wet kisses and his hands in his hair and the little whimpering noise he makes when Ray pushes forward. And Ray really likes the way Mikey feels pressed all up against him, and when he feels Mikey pressing hard against his thigh he rocks into it. And it's not weird, it's just good.

Mikey breaks the kiss muttering, "what happened to you being straight?" with a grin.

"I don't know," Ray says, shifting closer, "maybe I'm only gay for you, Mikeyway."

Mikey snorts "I must be special then."

"You are," Ray says seriously "you really are."

So Mikey says “how gay for me are you?” He swivels his hips and Ray gasps and buries his face in Mikey's throat.

“Pretty gay.” He says. Mikey kisses his jaw, nips a little. The blood is pounding in his ears.

“You want to get out of here?” Mikey asks.

“Yeah.” Ray gasps.

They end up going to Ray's because Mikey says he wants him to feel comfortable in case he has a sudden gay sex freakout. (Mikey knows about unexpected gay sex freakouts, he's unfortunately been on the receiving end of one of two. stupid jerk ex-boyfriends) and Ray says "Sure we can go to mine, but because I don't want Frank giving a running commentary. Also? I'm not gonna freak out, Mikes."

(You know frank would hold up score cards.)

(He so would. And grade them on like, volume and length of time. Shout out helpful suggestions.)

So yeah, they go to Ray's instead, and he lives with one of his bros so they go straight to his room and Ray suddenly has a Mikeyway on his bed and it's kind of startlingly intimate and nervewracking and exciting all at once.

And Mikey stretches out his hand and says "just come over here, we can do whatever you want."

But Ray doesn't know where to START. He says as much to Mikey, who rolls his eyes, pushes Ray onto the bed and climbs into his lap.

"It's really not that different" he points out and kisses Ray until Ray can't concentrate on anything but Mikey's lips. He has his hands up the back of Mikey's tight tshirt and suddenly thinks it would be great if it was OFF. So he tugs and pulls and tries to wrestle it off but he also doesn't want to stop TOUCHING Mikey so its all all over the place and Mikey's glasses go flying and he falls off Ray's lap and onto the floor with a thump. They both freeze at the sound and then Ray bursts out laughing

That does a nice job of getting cutting the tension, Mikey is just Mikey and his smile is so pretty and he's all flushed and mussed and gorgeous. Ray can't even believe he could be this lucky. So he slides down onto the floor as well and pushes Mikey's hair out of his face and tells him that. Straight out says "you're gorgeous, I can't believe you would want this."

And Mikey says "are you kidding what the fuck. I always do." And he knee walks over and tugs at Ray's shirt til Ray gets the idea and struggles out of it. he's kind of self conscious but Mikey is LOOKING at him and Ray feels like he'd burn up under Mikey's steady gaze but then Mikey's kissing him again, one hand on his biceps and pushing him back to lie on the carpet.

Mikey's kind of ferocious and Ray's head spins because fuck, Mikey really wants this, really wants _him_ and Ray still can't quite get his head around it, but he's not going to argue, not with Mikey's hands and mouth on him and it's just so fucking good.

Mikey's mouth is all over his chest and arms and stomach and then he just keeps going and his long hands are on the button fly of Ray's jeans and suddenly his jeans are down round his ankles and so are his boxers.

"Oooh" Mikey breathes.

(is Mikey maybe a bit of a size queen? MAYBE?) (LOL Mikey is totally a size queen. In all verses. Ever.)

Ray fights the urge to cover his stomach with his hands. Mikey's gaze is a warm weight on his skin and Ray's cock jumps. Mikey mutters something that sounds like "I knew it" but before Ray has a chance to ask, Mikey's all over him again, kissing him hard. He whispers against Ray's lips, "no freakouts okay?" and then he fits his hand around Ray's dick and Ray's brain short circuits. He can kind of work out where it is going but it's still the best kind of shock when Mikey slides his mouth down to meet his hand and sucks.

It's not like Ray's never gotten a blow job before, but this is definitely the first one he's had by someone who's not a girl. He's not sure if it's Mikey's enthusiasm, or how he's not being overly gentle, or the way he palms Ray's balls as he sucks, or maybe how Mikey seems to revel in Ray's generous size rather than shy from it - but it's really fucking good. It's like, easily the best BJ Ray's had in his LIFE. To the point where he is kind of embarrassingly close, embarrassingly fast.

He manages to make his arms work and paws at Mikey's head and shoulders. "Mikey! Stop!" he manages.

Mikey moans and keeps sucking but Ray manages to push one hand into Mikey's hair and says, “stop, please Mikey, please.”

Mikey pulls off and looks WRECKED, mouth swollen and red and he focuses hazy eyes on Ray and says "Sorry, that was too fast, you're freaking out."

"I'm not freaking out," Ray argues, voice harsh and panting, "just, if you didn't stop I was gonna come all over you."

Mikey's eyes light up and he licks his lips, "Yeah?"

"Fuck yeah," Ray says, still trying to get control of himself.

Mikey groans, "Fuck Ray," then he starts to scrabble frantically at his own jeans, "Sorry, sorry, fuck, I just have to-"

Ray is so seriously braindead he doesn't even compute what's going on until Mikey's got his dick out, stroking it carelessly, "Shit, Ray. Fuck."

And it's another guys DICK and Ray's aware on one level that he could potentially be freaking out, but mostly, it's part of Mikey, and Mikey is so HOT, for him, so he shuffles forward and wraps his hand round Mikey. His dick is hot in his grip and Mikey shudders as he starts to stroke, trying out what works on him, though Mikey is more slender, elegant almost, and that's a weird thought to be having about another guys dick, but Mikey crashes his mouth down on Ray's, panting in-between kisses and moaning in the back of his throat. It's awkward, the angle is weird, but Ray doesn't want to stop, because Mikey is moaning non stop and writhing against him, just from this, just from Ray's hand on him.

Ray is a motherfucking SEX GOD. He bites gently at Mikey's lips, which just makes him moan more, and tries to keep a rhythm. Mikey gets even harder under his hand and fuck, Ray did that, Ray's doing that to him, making him react like this. It's intoxicating. He wants to do everything, try everything.

"Mikey," he mutters between kisses, finding a better angle with his hand and yeah, Mikey's shoving into him now, pushing back against Ray's strokes, "Mikey," he repeats, because fuck he just needs to say this out loud, the thought is so hot his head is spinning, "I want to suck you."

Mikey makes a strangled noise, bucks into Ray's hand and comes all over his belly.

Ray’s suddenly as close as he was when Mikey was sucking him, because he did that to him, he made Mikey look like that, and he just wants to get off, look at Mikey, red staining his cheeks and his lips bitten and swollen, and just COME. He wraps his hand round his own dick this time and gives himself a couple of quick, rough stokes. His hand is wet and it takes him longer than it should have to realise its because it’s still got some of Mikey’s come on it. Mikey must realise at about the same time because he says “Shit, SHIT, Ray,” and knocks Ray’s hand away and finishes him off, his grip sure and tight, and Ray grunts “oh,” and comes, spilling over Mikey’s hand.

He flops back, panting, and Mikey wipes his hand on the rug and nuzzles into his neck. the room smells of sweat and come, and, this close, Mikey’s hairspray.

“We didn’t make it to the BED,” Ray says, after a while, kind of stunned. He just had sex with a guy, with MIKEY, on the floor. “I’m sorry.”

“What for:” Mikey props his chin on Ray’s chest so he can look him in the face “It’s not like it’s the worst place I’ve ever had sex.”

“That's not the point,” Ray manages “i was trying to- you deserve-”

“Hey,” Mikey kisses him “Only thing I’m disappointed about is that I kind of wanted you to fuck me.”

Ray has to close his eyes against that, imagining Mikey’s long legs wrapped around him.

“Lets get in bed and give it an hour” he says, feeling sleepy and turned on both “and I’ll see what I can do.

They crawl back into the bed and Ray, embarrassingly, falls asleep almost instantly.

When he wakes up, he has a Mikeyway, naked and mussed, draped across his torso, one hand propped under his head and watching Ray with dark eyes behind smudged glasses. He also has one hand on Ray's dick. No wonder Ray was having good dreams.

"Hey," Mikey says, his mouth twitching up a little at the side. He's moving his hand on Ray's dick real slow.

"Hey," Ray says, and it comes out gritty and only a little startled.

"It's later," Mikey explains and tightens his grip a little. Ray's breath comes out in a rush as all the blood in his body races to his cock.

"Um, okay," he grunts, his hips lifting up off the bed and pushing into Mikey's touch totally without his say-so. Mikey just grins and leans down, brushing his mouth teasingly against Ray's until Ray can't stand it anymore. He grips the back of Mikey's head, fingers tangling in the messy snarls and pulls Mikey closer, kissing him properly. He tastes sleepy and a little stale but it doesn't matter, it's still good. He slips Ray his tongue immediately and Ray's sleepiness evaporates as Mikey's tongue fucks into his mouth, slick and in time with his hand on Ray's dick.

It's so fucking good. Ray has to break the kiss to breathe, panting, "Fuck Mikey, you're trying to kill me."

"Totally the opposite," Mikey whispers, then goes back in for more, biting lightly at Ray's lips and working his dick, firm and slow, until Ray's cock is slick with pre-come, he's so fucking turned on already. He gropes between their bodies for where he can feel Mikey's cock pressed hard against his thigh. He can't let Mikey do all the work.

When his clumsy fingers find a grip and starts to stroke Mikey's dick, slow and careful, Mikey hisses out a breath and swears. Ray smiles, revelling in his reaction. _He_ did that. Fuck, he's so gone for Mikey it's not funny.

They kiss some more, jerking each other until it starts to get intense. The kisses and touches get more heated, messier, faster, until Mikey lets go of Ray's dick, and grabs Ray's wrist, stilling his hand.

"No, we're fucking this time, you promised." Mikey says, totally serious and jesus, Ray has to reach down and hold tight to the base of his cock so he doesn't just blow his load right then and there. He takes a few deep breaths, trying to calm down, and when he finally opens his eyes Mikey is watching him hungrily. Without breaking his gaze, Mikey reaches back, groping on the bedcovers behind him and coming back with a condom that's Ray's usual brand, and a familiar looking tube of slick.

"Where did you get that?" Ray asks, because that is totally his jerkoff lube.

"I went through your drawers while you were sleeping," Mikey answers, totally casual, and Ray can't raise enough braincells to even try to talk to Mikey about invasion of privacy because Mikey just pops the cap on the tube and squeezes some out on his fingers. Then he reaches behind himself and Ray just stares, his mouth falling wide as he watches Mikey's eyes slide closed as he starts to finger himself.

It's totally the hottest thing Ray's ever seen, and it's not like he can even see what Mikey's doing, it's just, the way his body shifts, his eyes sliding half-shut and he bites his lip. The way he rocks back against his fingers, clearly loving it.

"Is that good?" He asks, his voice sounding shaky and oh my god he is such a loser.

Mikey just hums, and grinds back against his own hand, and fuck Ray really fucking likes that. He wants to do that. To Mikey. Fuck, _fuck_ Ray has to touch him. Now.

He fumbles for the lube, suddenly desperate. "Can I - I mean, could I?"

"Sure, yeah Ray, c'mon," Mikey drawls, his voice sounding like fucking sex, and Ray's fingers feel thick and clumsy as he gets the cap open and squeezes way too much lube on his fingers. He leans closer to Mikey, so close he can see the dots of sweat on his upper lip and reaches down between his legs, his hand hovering over where Mikey's is.

Mikey withdraws with a wet sound that shouldn't be as hot as it is, then his slick fingers close around Ray's wrist, guiding his hand down.

"One finger, or like, two?" Ray asks, painfully unsure.

"Two," Mikey says, "I like the stretch."

"My fingers are bigger than yours," Ray points out and fuck did he seriously just say that out loud?

Mikey just gives him a smile, "That's not all that's bigger."

Ray nearly dies of some kind of hotness/embarrassment combination, but luckily Mikey distracts him from his impending death by tugging his wrist until his fingertips brush at his ass. Mikey resettles on the bed, his legs falling wider and oh god, Ray can't really believe he's doing this. He presses his index and middle finger together, takes a breath, and lets Mikey guide him inside.

He's so tight. So hot and tight around Ray's fingers. The sensation goes right to Ray's cock and fuck he just has to breathe and concentrate because he doesn't want to mess this up and hurt Mikey. He watches Mikey's face really carefully as he slides his fingers all the way inside and Mikey just... god, he just takes it. He groans low in his throat and shifts on the bed, nudging down against Ray's hand. Ray sucks in a startled breath, not sure if he should move his hand or what but Mikey solves the dilemma when he just starts riding Ray's fingers, fucking himself on them. His breath hitches with his movements and Ray's not sure, but he thinks he might just spontaneously combust from how fucking hot this is.

He's so turned on his dick is throbbing and he's not even touching it. And he doesn't even care.

"Oh crap, Mikey. Oh fuck," he has no control over his mouth either. He just, holy shit, he just can't process this. His last girlfriend didn't even let him go below the waist before the three month mark and he's got his fingers in Mikey's _ass_ on their third fucking date. It's surreal. And fucking amazing.

 _Mikey_ is amazing. And sexy. So fucking sexy. Ray's just lost in the sensations, Mikey's tightness around his fingers, his body pressed warm up against Ray's side, Ray could do this for hours. Then Mikey's fingers brush against Ray's oversensitised dick sending a jolt of pure sensation right through him that nearly has him leaping off the bed. He freezes, bites down hard on his lip, and concentrates on just _not coming_. Jesus Christ, he's never this easy, what has Mikey done to him?

The rip of foil gets his attention and he opens his eyes just in time to see Mikey tear the condom wrapper open. With his teeth. It's maybe the hottest thing Ray's seen in his entire life, but then Mikey reaches down and starts to roll the condom onto Ray's cock and Ray has to reassess that because now _this_ is the hottest thing he's seen in his life. It's probable that he's going to have to reassess that a _lot_ over the next half hour or so.

Mikey strokes lube over Ray's sheathed dick, and even though his grip is loose, Ray still has to moan, his hips pushing up into Mikey's hands. He takes it for as long as he can, and then he has to reach down and grab Mikey's hand, his breath coming harsh as he tells Mikey desperately, "If you keep making the preview this good, there's not gonna be a main event."

Mikey snorts out half a laugh and wipes his hands off on the sheets. He leans close to give Ray a sloppy kiss, "Okay, I can take a fucking hint."

"Do you need me to-?" Ray starts to ask, but Mikey's already guiding Ray's fingers out of him, a long shaky breath leaving his lips as Ray's fingers slide free. He lies there for a moment, his eyes closed and just breathing and it make Ray a little worried. "Are you-"

"Shhh," Mikey hushes him, fluttering his fingers at Ray in a _hang on a sec_ kind of way.

Ray holds still, his gaze skittering down Mikey's body, over chest and belly to his dick and fuck, he's so hard. There's a shiny drop of precome right on the tip of Mikey's dick and Ray fixates on it, his mouth watering. Right in front of his eyes, Mikey's dick jerks, without either of them touching it and god, he must be so fucking close too.

"Okay," Mikey says, after a long moment, blinking up at Ray, "Okay, how do you want me?"

"Um," Ray's not exactly an expert here. "Like, whatever you, um, I don't know."

Mikey rolls his eyes at Ray, then flips over onto his stomach, pushing up onto his knees. He should look awkward, all sharp angles and bony lines, but he doesn't. He looks so fucking hot. Ray's fingers twitch to touch him.

"What if I-" He reaches up, not touching Mikey, not yet, just seeing how fucking big his hands look next to Mikey's delicate hips. He feels so awkward and clumsy. "What if I do it wrong? How will I know if I'm hurting you?"

Mikey sighs, raising an eyebrow at Ray through his messy bangs. "Fine then," he kneels up and pushes Ray down onto his back. Ray misjudges where the end of the bed is and nearly falls off when he reaches out to steady himself. Mikey nearly elbows him in the face pulling him back onto the mattress.

Luckily instead of Mikey throwing his hands up and dismissing it all as a lost cause, he just giggles. "Okay, if you're gonna be so fucking paranoid, then just lie here and I'll do all the work."

Ray's not sure how he feels about that, but he quickly decides it's just fine, ducking Mikey's arm as he climbs on top of Ray, settling himself in Ray's lap. "Okay?" he asks, and Ray can't answer except to nod dumbly, because shit, the way Mikey's balanced over him now, all lean lines and naked skin, his hard dick swaying right in front Ray. It's a gorgeous picture. Ray's mouth goes dry and he still can't believe he's actually here.

Mikey shifts a little, settling his knees on either side of Ray's thighs, reaching behind himself, his bottom lip caught between his teeth. Ray gasps when Mikey's hand finds his dick. He's calmed down a little, but not much, and fuck he's just got to breathe, to keep steady, not move while Mikey - holy _shit_ \- lowers himself onto Ray's dick.

It's intense and fucking exquisite. Ray's hands ball into fists on the mattress as Mikey sinks down on him, breath by breath. He's so fucking tight. So fucking hot. Ray has to close his eyes, every muscle in his body held still so he doesn't just grab Mikey's hips and thrust up into him. Oh god. It's the best kind of slow torture.

Then Mikey stops moving, stops slowing sliding down and Ray blinks his eyes open, looking down and realising, oh god, he's all the way in. There's heat and pressure all around Ray's dick and he can't fucking catch a breath.

He blinks up at Mikey, whose eyes are fluttering, his mouth agape, sucking in fast breaths.

"Mikey?" he asks, needing to know he's okay.

Mikey braces a hand on Ray's chest, "Just give me a minute," he says, his voice fucking shredded and it's so sexy, "Just, god Ray, you're fucking huge."

"I'm sorry," Ray says without thinking, and Mikey snorts, "No god, don't be sorry. Holy shit. It's good, it's really, really good just-" Mikey sucks in another breath, licking his lips and Ray gets stuck looking at them, all wet and shiny as Mikeys says, "I just need a... yeah. Okay I can-"

Then Mikey starts to move, pushing up on his knees incrementally and Ray can't help the high pitched noise that comes out of his mouth because oh _fuck_ \- friction. Ray holds himself agonizingly still as Mikey pushes up, and then sinks back down, slow, so fucking slow. The only sound between them for long moments is the slide of skin and their laboured breathing and Ray's going out of his mind - desperate to move, desperate to keep still. He reaches up weakly and Mikey grabs his hand, guiding it to rest on Mikey's hip. Ray lays it there gingerly, his fingers wide and dark against Mikey's pale skin. He strokes his thumb gently over the rise of Mikey's hipbone.

"Help me," Mikey says, squeezing Ray's hand into a grip on his hip and then he starts to move faster. Ray holds onto Mikey, trying to bear some of his weight without rushing his movements. Then all real thought goes out the window, because holy _shit_ Mikey is _fucking himself on Ray's dick_.

Ray whimpers, clenching his thighs and gritting his teeth, breathing in the scent of sweat and sex in rushed breaths. "Fuck Mikey," he mutters, but Mikey doesn't answer, just keeps moving, slowly getting faster, up and down on Ray's cock and fuck, Ray's gonna lose his mind.

He grabs Mikey's hip with his other hand, so he can use both to support him. Mikey's skin is slick and hot under Ray's fingers and Mikey face - oh god - his eyes are half closed and his mouth is hanging open, damp strands of hair sticking to his face. He looks like pure sex and fuck, Ray has to kiss him.

Ray leans up awkwardly on his elbows, nose-butting Mikey before he manages to get their mouths together in a messy kiss that clashes their teeth.

"Fuck, Ray," Mikey gasps, the words hot against Ray's lips, "Fuck, can you just-"

"What? Anything, I-"

"Fuck me. God just fucking move. Fuck me, Ray, I'm not gonna break."

Ray whimpers, his fingers tightening on Mikey's hips and he just, fuck he can't hold back anymore. He lets his hips thrust up, trying to hold back as much as he can, but he's shaking after holding still so long. He grimaces as his hips move too fast, fuck he's pushing too hard, holding on too tight but he can't stop, can't help himself, oh fuck.

"Yes," Mikey says, "Yes, yes, more, fuck, yes, more, oh-"

Ray face distorts with pleasure and relief. Oh god it's okay, thank fuck it's okay because he can't stop now, it feels so fucking good, Mikey's so tight and hot around his dick, his rhythm is sending Ray's blood hot.

"Oh thank god," Ray whispers, leaning up to find Mikey's mouth again. Mikey grabs Ray and hauls him up to a near sitting position, clinging to his shoulders and Ray can't help himself, the curve of Mikey's neck is right there. He opens his mouth over the pulse point above Mikey's collarbone and sucks, smothering a deep groan into Mikey's skin as they fuck - as he _fucks Mikey_ oh god. Mikey shoves his fingers into Ray's hair, writhing in Ray's lap. It's all feels fucking amazing and it's gonna be over so soon. Ray's so close already.

When he opens his eyes Mikey's got one hand wrapped around his dick, jerking himself off as he fucks himself on Ray's cock. Ray knows he should be helping get Mikey off - god what a dud fuck he is - but he's so far gone he can barely keep a rhythm. It's fast and hard now. Mikey's hand is a blur and there's the swift slap-slap of flesh as Ray fucks up into Mikey.

Mikey twitches into his hand, bouncing on Ray's dick, his face contorting into a beautiful grimace and Ray knows he's close. "Yeah, Mikey," he mutters, "Fuck yeah," and slips a hand up to cup the back of Mikey's head, leaning forward to suck on Mikey's neck, feeling Mikey's pulse jump under Ray's lips.

Ray doesn't so much see Mikey come as hear it in the "Oh, oh god, oh fuck-" Mikey groans out and the warm spatter of Mikey's come hitting Ray's belly. And oh. Fuck. That is so hot. Ray groans, speeding his thrusts, clenching his hands tight on Mikey's head and hip as he thrusts home once, twice more, then he's coming, his whole body going stiff and shaking as he releases inside Mikey, pleasure spiking through him so intense he's pretty sure he goes blind for a moment.

When he finally comes down, he's panting and he's holding Mikey in a death grip. His heart's beating so fast he feels dizzy and he can't fight the huge lazy smile his mouth pulls into.

"Holy shit," he whispers, "that was. Holy _shit_ Mikey."

Mikey giggles, and it vibrates through his body, shocking Ray's oversensitive dick that's still in Mikey's ass. Mikey laughs into Ray's hair and then settles back a little, reaching behind to hold the condom on Ray's dick while he pulls himself off, then flops down beside Ray on his back.

"Oh yeah," Mikey sighs, "That's what I needed."

Ray strips off the condom and ties it off with clumsy fingers, dumping in the trash before sliding down onto his back beside Mikey. He rolls onto his side to face Mikey, suddenly weirdly shy, "So, um, that was okay then?"

Mikey rolls his eyes, but there's smile tugging at his mouth. He leans close to drop a kiss on Ray's mouth. "Yeah, you were okay." He kisses Ray again, a little more forceful, but still lazy and slow. When he breaks it he pulls back a little, his eyes warm on Ray's face as he pets a hand through his curls. "You were more than okay, Ray Toro."

Ray just has to smile.

*  
Ray sleeps like the DEAD and by the time he’s really awake the next day it’s already late afternoon. Mikey’s curled up into him, somehow contorting his long legs and arms into a ball and Ray has his arm clamped round his waist. He goes to pull away, in case Mikey doesn’t like to be crowded in bed, but Mikey makes a little “mmmmmno” sort of sound and snuggles back into him.

“You’re awake,” Ray says and wants to smack himself for stating the obvious.

“So are you, eventually.” Mikey says “I thought I’d fucked the life out of you.” He wriggles round and kisses Ray a little haphazardly on the mouth.

“Seem to remember it was me doing the fucking,” Ray says.

“Yeah it was,” Mikey grins and stretches.  
“It was awesome.” He beams up at Ray and Ray feels like he won the fucking lottery or something. He reaches out to push Mikey's sweaty greasy hair out of his face, cup his cheek to kiss him properly. Mikey's pushing against him at once, grinding into him and Ray wonders just how much Mikey was holding BACK before, jesus. He's about to try getting his hand round Mikey's dick again when his stomach rumbles. Loudly.

Mikey laughs into the kiss and rolls off him.

“Come on Toro,” he says. “I'll buy you breakfast. Dinner. Whatever.”

He's standing in the middle of the room completely naked and Ray can't get enough of just looking at him. Mikey spreads his arms and does a sarcastic twirl, and that's when Ray notices the huge fucking hicky on his throat.

“Oh shit, I'm sorry” he says, scrambling out of bed to press his fingers to it. Mikey hisses and Ray goes to pull away, but the Mikey leans into it

“It's ok,” he says “I like it. Like knowing that was you. Like that everyone can see.”

Ray has to kiss him again, and again, but Mikey seems kind of fixated on food (or more likely coffee) and pulls away before Ray can get both hands on his ass. He turns to grab a shirt, but Ray says

“Shower?” more out of hope than expectation. But there's no why they don't look (and smell) like they've been fucking all night and if Ray has to face his brother's knowing looks he's going to do it without Mikey's come flaking off of his skin.

Mikey frowns but then says “Make it worth my while.”

What with the shower, and the handjobs, and the second shower because somehow Mikey managed to come in Ray's HAIR, it's early evening by the time they eventually leave Ray's apartment.

Mikey says “Dave's?” and Ray says “Sure,” and so they find themselves back at the bar where it all started. There's no band tonight so they can sit in a booth and pick at wings and nachos, and Mikey can lean against Ray, smelling like Ray's shampoo and the cigarette he smoked in the car. He's all loose and floppy and giggly and Ray is so enthralled by this Mikey, this just-got-fucked happy Mikey, that it's all he can do to keep his hands off him. Especially as that's Ray's shirt he's wearing, one of Ray's favourite washed-soft Iron Maiden shirts. It slips on Mikey's thinner shoulders, the collar gaping to show the hicky. Ray doesn't feel _proud_ that he's kind of getting off on the whole wearing his clothes thing, but well. He kind of does.

Mikey sneaks a hand onto his thigh, running his fingers up and down Ray's inseem. Ray shifts, surprised, but it only brings him closer to Mikey, who's pressed all up against him in the booth.

“What are you doing?” Ray asks.

“Nothing?” Mikey completely fails at looking innocent, and inches his hand higher, closer to Ray's cock. “Just amusing myself.”

Ray captures his hand and laces their fingers together, then brings their joined hands to rest on the table.

“If you keep touching me like that I'm going to come,” he says, honestly “and I'd rather not do that in front of everyone.”

Mikey leans even closer and whispers, lips brushing his ear “Bathroom? I have some fond memories of the bathroom in this place.”

Ray shakes his head. It's tempting, but it doesn't fit with the whole treat him right thing. Mikey deserves so much more than a fumbled fuck in a dirty bathroom and he kind of wants to punch everyone who taught him otherwise.

Mikey's eyes flicker and he starts to draw back. Ray holds onto his hand and says “I want to do this right. You’re worth more than Dave's bathroom.” He's not sure he's expressing himself properly but Mikey seems to get what he means, all but climbing into Ray's lap to kiss him. Ray has both arms full of Mikeyway when a voice says

“You really will go at it anyway won't you Way?”

And it's the chump! With a black eye from Mikey's fist but still looking so fucking snotty and superior, like he ever had any right to touch Mikey. Ray opens his mouth to say something but Mikey beats him to it, looking at the chump from under his eyelashes

“Like you wouldn't be begging for it if I asked,” he says, voice dipping low. “Fuck off. I'm having dinner with my boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend?” The chump says “HIM?”

Ray wants to say something but Mikey beats him too it again. He dips his shoulder so the t shirt collar falls down, hicky on display. Ray presses his mouth to it, like a dare.

“Ray's never been with a guy before and he STILL fucks me better than you ever managed,” Mikey says. “So really, fuck off.”

The chump kind of glares but Mikey just looks back at him, unblinking, until he turns round and marches off.

Mikey sags back against Ray, all the tension drained out of him.

“Boyfriend?” Ray asks. Because he was hoping, but he also KNOWS Mikey and he didn't want to push things too soon in case Mikey got scared.

“Boyfriend,” Mikey says firmly. “Unless you don't-”

“I do,” Ray says. Mikey kisses him again.

“Want to head back to mine and traumatise Frank?” he says after long minutes have passed. Ray realises his hand is up the back of Mikey's shirt, but Mikey doesn't seem to mind.

“Absolutely,” he says.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic] Wishing it's real (and knowing it's not)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1956852) by [argentumlupine](https://archiveofourown.org/users/argentumlupine/pseuds/argentumlupine)




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